HELD

Freakin' MDC

Jan. 28th, 2007 at 8:38 AM

ok so this is what i get for lurking @ MDC. no good can come of it right now, really. but i sometimes like to read the birth boards there, b/c it's a nice balance (read: other extreme!) from my SK DIJ birth board, where LITERALLY and I kid you not, every single freakin' mother on the my SK board has had their baby, EXCEPT those of us planning natural/homebirths. Everyone got induced weeks before their EDD for no reason, or right on their EDD at the latest...so it's really like me, and 3-4 other mamas. And they are all past their EDD too, fyi. So I feel really lonely over there-everyone's babies are like a MONTH old, weeks old, and all the talk is from pregnancy to baby stuff and I'm jealous and emotional and it makes me sad to read it.

Ok anyway-so my point-I go to MDC to feel not crazy and alone-most other mamas choosing obviously to go past EDD and wait it out and not induce unless medically necessary and stuff. Yay for not feeling like a minority, right?

Well now there is this whole thread about the increased risk of STILLBIRTH after EDD and this one mama posting about how her daughter DIED @ like...41w or something and the ONLY reason the baby died was b/c the placenta calcified and the baby asphyxiated and waaaaaaaaaaaah. She said movement was fine prior, there was no indication anything was wrong, the cause of death was asphxiation due to postterm pregnant or something. It just happened all of a sudden.

So I realize that's probably rare but like that was the last thing I pretty much needed to hear or read right now...so I'm of course freaking out and really wanting to run to the hospital and beg to be induced LOL

*sigh*

I am a friggin' emotional wreck. This is so ridiculous. It really is. I am getting on my own nerves and that's never a good thing. Never. But I just feel like...what else can I DO?? I've tried all the natural induction methods, to no avail. We talk to Catti every day, Keith, Mairi AND Me, telling/asking her to come out, all day long...I've gotten myself waxed, haircut, pedicure, grocery shopped, baby shopped, cleaned the house (well keith did that part...), we go swimming almost every day, I'm active, I'm going to church this morning even though I just want to sit home and whine and be depressed and stupid. Even though church will annoy me b/c people will ask me "why are you still pregnant" and "when are you having her" like i have some secret date or knowledge that i am just choosing NOT to share with every. wtf.

gaaaaah!!!

Did I mention I'm a wreck? Am I completely annoying you guys yet? Really, I don't know why I wasn't this...whatever I am with Mairi. I really wasn't. I would like to know the difference. But now in addition to freaking out about my heart condition coming back, I'm freaking out about you know. What I read on MDC. *sniff* That's way scarier than my stupid heart condition.